You can use your desires as a path to discover and experience your deepest self! This experience of self, that we sometimes call Soul, or integrity, can be a basis for living a meaningful life. Consider:

• What makes sense in your life?
• Why are you here?
• What is your life purpose?
• How will you know that you are fulfilling your life purpose?

These questions may seem ridiculous - or they may seem worthy of deep introspection. Your answers may not seem to relate to your normal, everyday life. Your life consists of normal everyday days. Here is a normal everyday question: What do you want?

Such statements may reflect not what you want, but what you believe, “It’s not good to say what you want”, “If you say what you want you will offend somebody” or “What’s the point – I can’t get it anyway”.

Well formed goals provide direction and motivation. Verbalize your wishes – start sentences beginning with “I want...” – and your world may change.

Your answers to deep goal questions may require information that you can only gain unconsciously. You may go into trance-like states as you consider your life goals.

Evidence of success?

You may want a bigger house, more happiness, less suffering. Maybe you may want a romantic holiday in Hawaii or to get rid of your old car. Your answers may seem to only reflect your current needs.

Yet, if pursued, your answers will lead to profound questions of purpose and meaning. And if your goal reflects your life’s purpose; if your goal has deep meaning for you, achieving it will be fulfilling.

What do you want NOW?

Do you know exactly what you don’t want? Maybe you don’t want to be unhappy. This thought will likely accompany images of unhappiness. Ask instead “What do I want instead of being unhappy?” Perhaps you want more something? Maybe you want more money. This thought will likely accompany images of not having enough money.

“How will you know if you are happy?" “How will you know if you have more money?” If you continually state negative goals or comparisons - you may be excluding an important part of yourself from your decision process. Include this part by focusing on and verbalizing what you do want.

Do you normally make “multiple” wishes? Do you want money and freedom? Do you want a university degree so that you can find self-respect? Do you want someone to do something for you? Such double-wishes usually indicate inner conflict.

Can you put your wishes into a sequence? Would having money lead to freedom - or would having freedom be a step towards money? Can you let go of cause-effect language? How else can you find self-respect? Can you take responsibility? What benefit will you have if that someone does that something for you?

Some multiple wishes may be mutually exclusive. For example, “I want a monogamous relationship AND I want many affairs”. “I want to put all my effort into building a business AND I want to travel around the world for an extended holiday”.

In this case, find the advantages of achieving both goals – even if their simultaneous fulfillment is impossible! What would become possible for you if you were to have already achieved both those goals? This question may help you find a more profound goal. (See Double Wishes)

What EXACTLY do you want?

Maybe you want happiness, or love, or health. Abstract goals are unlikely to support your success. Do you know how you want to achieve your goal? How do you want to have happiness Do you know how you will know if you achieve your wish? What would convince you that you have love And do you know your real goal? For what purpose do you want health?

When do you want this?

Do you have goals without deadlines? Do you want to feel wonderful - sometime? Do you want a high quality relationship - before you die? Even if you know exactly what you want - if you do not choose a time frame, your chance for success may lessen. Exactly when do you want your success?

Achieving what goals would convince you that you are fulfilling your life purpose?

Unresolved abuse or trauma support internal conflict, which can undermine your ability to move forward, joyously, toward your dreams and goals. Do you experience internal conflict as critical voices, as unpleasant feelings or as guilt and shame? Is your optimism replaced by hopelessness? Do you keep repeating habits that only bring suffering? Are you ready to change - are you ready to pursue your personal dreams and fulfill your unique visions?

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