Europe time:

Hawaii time:

Systemic Solutions contact details
Soulwork America / Hawaii Soulwork Canada Soulwork Croatia / Hrvatska Soulwork Polska Soulwork Italia Systemic Solutions  Deutschland Soulwork Czech Systemic Solutions Slovakia    Telephone Coaching : Private Sessions : Professional Training : Organizers : Corporate


 

Home Page

Skype & Telephone Coaching


Coaching Humor
Your Next Step
Couple Coach
Private Sessions
Coach Training
Coach Exam
Preparation
PayPal

Prices
FAQ

Coach Training Calendar

Find (check spelling)

Articles
Abortion
Abuse
Accelerate Learning
Addictions
Adoption
Affairs
Allergies
Anxiety
Beliefs
Bonded Relationship
Chaos Theory
Child Abuse
Client Abuse
Coaching Contracts
Coach Philosophy
Coaching Children
Codependence
Conflicts
Couple Coaching
Cults & Coaching
Dependence
Depression
Dissociation
Divorce
Divorce Children
Eating Disorders
Emotional Blackmail
Emotional Incest
Emotion Intelligence
Enjoy Partnership
Entanglements
Evaluate Partnership
Expert Modeling
Family Coaching
Family Constellations
Family Therapy
F A Q
Fathers & Daughters
Financial Maturity
Grief
Happiness
Healthy Relationships
Home Study Diploma
Human Consciousness
Human Systems
Hypertension
Identity Loss
Inner Child
Leadership
Learning Disabilities
Little Prince
Meaning of Life
Medication
Mental Illness
Mentorship
Mid-Life Crisis
Mothers & Daughters
Mothers & Sons
New Age
Pain Control
Parental Alienation
Partnership
Prtnershp Breakdown
Passive Aggressive
Past Partners
Premarital
Psychobiology
Psychosomatic
Recession
Quantum Coaching
Select a Coach
Sexual Abuse
Sexual Issues
Single Parents
Soul of Soulwork
Soulwork FAQ
Specialty Coaching
Stress Relief
Survival
Suicide
Therapist Abuse
Training Abuse
Trauma & Stress
Weight Loss
Yoga of Relationship

Interview w Martyn
Disclaimer
Disclosure
Huna Kalani
Privacy
Your Investment

eXTReMe Tracker

Systemic Solutions for Addictions

End self-destruction and suffering!
Telephone and Skype Coaching with Martyn Carruthers

It's easier for health professionals and patients to use drugs as a substitute for change. Self-medication with alcohol or nicotine, or anti-depressants and stimulants, are easier than applying intelligence and focus to complex relationship situations. Drugs are also cheaper for the patient (in the short term) and more profitable for the health professionals.

An increasing number of health professionals and their patients find the long-term consequences, side-effects and suffering from psychoactive drugs to be unacceptable. We offer alternatives.

Are you an Addict?

Addictions bring short-term relief and long-term nightmares. Although some addictions are common and the consequences well known; many intelligent and knowledgeable people become addicts. If internet and other compulsions and obsessions are included with addiction, few people seem to be free.

Addictions fulfill a goal of “I do not want to be me!” - or identity loss. Addictions help you dissociate or not-feel unpleasant emotions. We can help you end addictions, and help you change the emotions and relationships that motivate addictive behavior. But the longer you leave it - the harder it gets.

I’ve done every drug you could name and more. For a while I was doing them together, just to get away from myself and my life. But the highs never last; you come down again and you are back. Nothing changed except always a bit worse. London, UK

Drugs are not demons and drug addicts are not defective. Millions of people are addicts - not only to heroin, morphine, amphetamines, tranquilizers and cocaine, but also to alcohol, nicotine, caffeine, sugar, masturbation, work, theft, gambling, internet and sex. Addictions are very, very common. Look at these pictures of an addict ... could you or someone you love follow this descent into hell?

Descent into Hell

Before, during and after eight years of cocaine
The inner nightmare is even worse
[ Addict photographs from BBC News ]

The consequences of addiction include damaged health, damaged relationships and profound suffering. Yet, if you ask an addict, “Why do you to do this?" their answers seem incomplete. “I drink to forget what happened”. “I smoke to avoid being fat”. “Gambling is in my blood.” You will hear,  “I can stop anytime – I just don’t want to”.

Relationships with an Addicts

Relationships with addicts includes your relationship with that person's addiction - and with its consequences. A relationship with an addict demands your participation in that person's addiction. If you help an addict stay addicted - you may be a drug-dealer or a casino operator ... or you may be codependent or in an addictive relationship.

It is easy, and pointless, to blame an addict, an addictive behavior or the predators who benefit from addictions. But blaming rarely helps. We offer effective telephone coaching solutions - we help people who want to end their addictions, obsessions and compulsions.

Stress Disorders . Divorce and Children . Parent Alienation

Telephone Coaching

We offers ways to change the emotional impact of memories; in a complete system of life coaching for individuals, couples, families and teams. We can help you improve your relationships, resolve guilt, experience a profound sense of integrity and connectedness, and find your life goals. We help people resolve relationship bonds, emotional trauma and mentor damage.

Addiction: Benefits & Characteristics

Although chemical dependency may result from experiments with addictive substances, few experiments result in addiction. Common benefits of addictions are:

  • to experience pleasure

  • to avoid boredom, pain or unpleasant emotions

  • to fulfill the desires of an ancestor or family member
  • to maintain a dependent or codependent relationship

Addictive relationships are in a different category and often indicate relationship bonds and transference. Our systems coaching can help people resolve these relationships very quickly.

My addiction was a monster, always watching and always waiting. It followed me everywhere. If I had one moment of weakness, or despair, or panic, it would catch and devour me again.
I thought I could never, never be free of its hunger ... yet now I am.

Overwhelming Emotions

If you suffer unpleasant emotions or self-talk, including guilt, boredom, frustration & self-hatred, then a substance or activity that reduces your unpleasant emotions (or unpleasant self-talk), even for a short time, may become addictive. This includes many activities that can be obsessive or compulsive, such as hand-washing, internet browsing, compulsive working (workaholic) and gambling.

Systemic coaching solutions for addicts & addictions

Long term relief from unpleasant emotions can be found by resolving relationship issues - short term relief is found by distracting attention, finding stronger sensations than the unpleasant feelings or numbing the senses. If this relief becomes addictive, the consequences are often worse than feeling bad.

Before & after addiction - addiction pictures from BBC News

Our systemic coaching helps people build emotional intelligence and emotional maturity. We coach people to accept emotions, pleasant and unpleasant, as meaningful communications - as useful feedback about life. Following acceptance, we coach people to manage how they express emotions.

Many popular therapies and New Age techniques encourage people to dissociate their emotions. The relief of dissociating unpleasant feelings may feel good, but dissociation can lead to further identity loss, especially if the techniques are mindlessly repeated until dissociation is automatic.

Self Control & Conflict

Perhaps you suffer conflict. You may say “Part of me wants to do this, but another part of me wants to do something else”. Such parts communicate within emotions and behaviors. Expressing hidden emotions may fulfill a part of you that is lost or hidden. Conscious acknowledgement and internal mediation can bring peace. Systemic coaching can help you make peace with your parts.

Resolve Difficult Relationships

If a family needs a victim, a family member may fulfill a victim role with an addiction. If a person with a family background of addiction wants a relationship with an addict – addiction may seem normal. Many codependent people (and some therapists) are addicted to helping addicts.

(Some therapists help addicts to atone for their inability to help an addicted family member when the therapist was a child, or to avoid their own bad feelings resulting from emotional incest.)

Systemic diagnosis provides a key to unlock the doors of many addictions. Then we can coach people to dissolve relationship entanglements and the addictions that follow in their path.

Trauma & Abuse

Many people want to forget some horror. It could be the horror of a war, the horror of being an unwanted child, or the horror of being abused. If people want to forget their lives - identity loss can be a short-term blessing and a long-term curse. They are not alone - we can help them.

When I smoked crack, I forgot my sadness! During your coaching, I found I was clinging to my aborted child; I experienced a sort of sadness that grew until I smoked marijuana - which spiraled into cocaine addiction. After I sorted out my relationships (see dead person identification) cocaine seemed much less interesting. After a few months, my addiction with cocaine became more and more like a past bad dream.

Mentors & Role Models

Many people look for inspiration in the lives of others. Many children follow a parent and try to duplicate their lives. A teenager may follow a sport figure or music star. If the model is an addict, a person may follow the model into addiction. An avid fan might use drugs to be more like a successful model. Employees may overwork to show allegiance and loyalty to a workaholic manager.

I gambled because my mother did - I had no control - I thought it was genetic. Gambling helped me feel close to my difficult mother. You helped me accept my mother as she is. I could be with my mother and be her daughter without having to gamble or even get upset about it.

Systemic Telephone Coaching & Addictions

We coach motivated people towards long-term recovery. We help people find themselves and we coach couples to heal their relationships. We help families regain a sense of life.

Do you want to dissolve success and relationship issues?
Do you want to help people build success and quality relationships?

Do you want Telephone Coaching?

Copyright Martyn Carruthers 1997-2009 All rights reserved


The Relationship Coaching Institute

 
Telephone Coaching  ...  Professional Training  ... Your Next Step
America: Dragonfly, PO Box 675, Honaunau, Hawaii, 96726 USA
Europe
: Centar Angel, Trnsko 13A, 10020 Zagreb, Croatia
Help make the world a better place!  Email us at

Hawaii
Email us

Canada
Email us

Europe
Email us

Australia
Email us

Workshop

Systemic Coach Training  (Calendar)

Systems 1 How to evaluate relationship dynamics and recognize common entanglements
Systems 2 How to define life goals, identify blocks, resolve objections & plan for success
Systems 3 How to provide or continue goalwork using interactive metaphors and Dreamwork
Systems 4 How to dissolve the consequences of abuse and trauma, and rebuild motivation
Systems 5 How to change limiting beliefs and codependence for emotional freedom
Systems 6 How to recognize and resolve identity loss: recover lost qualities and lost skills
Systems 7 How to resolve therapist or spiritual damage and provide inspirational mentorship
Systems 8 How to coach partners to build lasting happiness and avoid partnership breakdown
Systems 9 How to coach parents to resolve family problems and to achieve family goals
Systems 10 How to coach team leaders and teams to develop while solving team problems
Systems 11 How to coach communities to survive and prosper in a changing world
Specialty Advanced workshops and specialty training tailored to fulfill your goals and needs

Copyright © Martyn Carruthers 1996-2009 All rights reserved. Soulwork Systemic Solutions were primarily developed by Martyn Carruthers. We train people to resolve emotional blocks and improve relationships. This information is for your general knowledge only. Please consult a physician about medical conditions and before changing any medical treatment. Link to our pages, but get Martyn's written permission to post or publish his work.

Sign up for PayPal and start accepting credit card payments instantly.