Many people use drugs instead of solving relationship
problems. Self-medication with alcohol, nicotine
or prescription anti-depressants, is easier than applying focus,
intelligence and analytical skills to goals, emotions and relationships.
I began using the name Soulwork in 1994,
when I attempted to describe a stable resource
state that seemed important to lasting of well-being and connectedness. As some of
my students and clients called this stable experience Soul,
I called that part of our coaching Soul-work.
(For more, see Origins of Soulwork.)
As many symptoms of mental and sometimes physical health
problems seemed to vanish following our coaching (see
I wanted to better understand and improve the results that we already enjoyed
Whenever I could, I interviewed people who had recovered from serious
mental and physical symptoms without professional medical assistance. The
challenge was obvious. How could I help people enjoy
this wellbeing and healing? What was the underlying psychology and psychobiology?
I translated many of your articles into
Slovak language. You talk to the whole brain.
You understand connections and bonds. That is why people mark your coaching
methods and articles as effective and understandable.
Samo Grznar, Slovakia
Which Reality is Real?
People who confuse their inner
and outer worlds may be called neurotic or psychotic. I sought to model how
people create healthy inner worlds (see Quantum Thinking
and Chaos Coaching), to help
people make better decisions (see Expert Modeling)
and to enjoy relationships (see Enjoying Partnership).
Consciousness is a long-standing mystery. Why are we aware of a few (7±2)
thoughts or feelings, while everything else lurks below our conscious
perception? Why are some memories readily accessible, while other important
memories are apparently buried without trace? There are so many theories.
I liked the global workspace theory developed in 1983 by
Bernard Baars of The Neuroscience Institute in San Diego, California.
Bernard said that people become conscious of information only if signals
are simultaneously broadcast to many regions of their brains - a
It seems that people make this global workspace inaccessible
if the information could damage important relationships, which supports theories of protective unconscious
Many clues to coaching people to develop health and happiness
appear to lie in the psychobiology and coordination of the neurological
structures that mediate perceptual, emotional and cognitive experiences - often
body-mind. Changes in the body-mind are quickly followed by changes
in emotional reactions, relationship behavior and even in the physical body.
Consider your brain to be an ecosystem of living organisms
that are continually preoccupied with multiple relationships.
Each of them is vital to the environment in which they exist ...
and that environment responds to your name.
Coaching the Body-Mind
While short-term change is commonplace, long-term change
seems to require:
- appropriate neurotransmitters are generated
- changes are acceptable to many sub-personalities
- simultaneous communication between many brain structures
It seems clear that cognitive
interventions (thoughts) are unlikely to communicate with brain
structures that mediate emotional, perceptual and somatic change (feelings).
However, spoken words can affect psychobiology and
Most adults can acknowledge and respond not only to logical questions and
requests, but to questions and requests embedded in imagery, music,
metaphors, movement and symbols. (Confirmation that messages are received,
and whether they are accepted or rejected can be seen by observing people's nonverbal responses).
The words conscious and unconscious seem to
refer to which parts of the brain process certain information. The left cerebral hemisphere is currently considered to dominate the processing of logic,
reason, judgment and understanding (thoughts), while the right hemisphere
is believed to dominate the processing of images, metaphor and inferred
Coaching the Left Cerebral Hemisphere
If the left brain hemisphere stores and processes logical information,
we can coach people to define their goals, to explore the consequences
of achieving those goals and the blocks to achieving them. Motivated
people then become actively and consciously involved with the cognitive
details of their own coaching.
Coaching the Right Cerebral Hemisphere
How would Western philosophy be different
if Descartes had said,
'I feel therefore I am'?
Research on alexithymia (people who cannot express emotions
may develop psychosomatic symptoms) implicates
the right cerebral hemisphere for storing and creating emotions. We can communicate
with the right brain using humor, metaphors, puns and symbols.
Coaching Both Sides Simultaneously
The work of Milton Erickson, MD, inspired me to research a
Hawaiian dreamtime ritual (moe uhane)
and develop what I called interactive metaphors. Interactive
metaphors appear to simultaneously stimulate both cerebral hemispheres.
I generally call this Dreamwork - that is, using interactive
isomorphic metaphors to help people understand and integrate their
emotional and cognitive responses.
With Dreamwork, I can help people identify the relationship sources of emotional reactions that delay or prevent them getting what they
want - and change them.
How can you stimulate left and right
brain activity simultaneously? When verbalizing goals, people unknowingly
communicate their objections with nonverbal incongruence. I assume
that incongruence indicates dissonance between verbal language processing
(left brain) and nonverbal or body language (right brain), or
between the cerebral cortex and the hind-brain.
Have you seen people say, "I understand",
while gently shaking
their heads from side to side? Other common signs of
include coughs and asymmetry.
Dissolving incongruence is a powerful way to help people manage their own objections to their own goals. (We teach this on our Systems 2
training). The key is to understand how the two sides of the brain communicate
with each other.
Continued ... Coaching the Limbic Brain
Online Life Coaching,
Counseling & Soulwork Therapy
......... Page 2 could start here ........
Coaching the Limbic System
Right brain and left brain communications appear to be simultaneously
processed through the limbic system, which associates thoughts
with feelings. The states generated by the limbic brain influence
and can override both the cognitive and the emotional processes of the neo-cortex. The
limbic brain appears to trigger both somatic sensations and
Coaching the limbic brain can help people change emotional states.
(Common examples include emotional reactions to art, poetry or
music). When the limbic system is engaged, people's physiology
and emotions change. Many people find better solutions for problems if they listen
to music, for example. This concept is utilized by teenagers everywhere, and
is commonly used in hypnosis and meditation.
A knowledge of the limbic brain helps explain
incongruence, for example knowing (intellectually) that something is
false, while feeling (emotionally) that it is true. (This seems especially
common when thinking is distorted by limiting beliefs).
The limbic brain is the source of feelings of
conviction. Paul MacLean, a neurobiology
pioneer, said: "The limbic system, that primitive brain
that can neither read nor write, provides us with feelings of
what is real, true and important.”
However, logical arguments (mediated by the neocortex) rarely change
emotional beliefs (mediated by the limbic system). Intuiting this, effective
salespeople and politicians make emotional, rather than logical, appeals.
Emotions may not be subject to the logical neocortex - even professional actors may be
unable to spontaneously choose to feel angry or happy, unless they access
appropriate memories first.
As the limbic system operates without conscious logic, classical conditioning
can be used to access
people's emotions, and to merge or dissociate them, often outside people's
awareness and often without their consent. Such techniques are taught in some
predatory sales trainings and seduction workshops.
By communicating with the limbic brain, we help people evaluate their own emotions, so that they can experience emotions as
interesting body-mind communications.
The resulting integrated brain functioning seems to minimize the
impact and influence of hypnotic language, sales pitches, seduction attempts and
political rhetoric! People can better choose how they want to react! Let's move
on to the pineal brain.
Coaching and the Pineal Gland
The pineal gland is in the center of the brain. It is most active until
puberty, when it shrinks and may calcify. It is rich in lecithin, which
has both neural and endocrine properties. The neural connections between the eyes
and pineal gland can sensitize the nervous system to ambient light.
The pineal gland synthesizes and secretes melatonin and pinoline
during darkness, entraining the nervous system to the local 24-hour clock
and perhaps acting as an antidepressant. Melatonin pre-puberty sexual development and may protect the nervous system against degeneration. Pinoline is also antioxidant and induces sleep and dreams.
It may also influence the metabolism of sugar.
The pineal gland has been a mystery for centuries
and has been
attributed with superstition, myth and many metaphysical theories.
Many people claim that the pineal gland is an intuitive
third eye chakra.
Lao Tzu described a 'gateway to heaven and
earth' in the center of the brain behind the eyes and wrote that
concentrating on it leads to realizing oneness. In this pearl is supposed to
be a light
which Confucius called virtuous perfection (jen); the Book of Change
(I Ching) called it the ultimate (wu chi), the Buddha called it perfect
knowledge (yuan ming) and Taoist literature called it an elixir of
immortality and spiritual light.
People are affected by the rhythm of their pineal glands and thus by
ambient light. (This hints at why dark retreats are favored by
Buddhist and Taoist monks). While it is relatively simple to change light
intensity when coaching, I find that coaching with interactive
metaphors (Dreamwork) can lead to predictable
of consciousness which are commonly described as light-filled or
inner light, etc, which may indeed be related to pineal gland function.
As the pineal responds to light,
and as the limbic system provides a sense of reality, both real and subjectively
perceived light (during guided meditations, for example) seems to affect the pineal gland's
production of melatonin and pinoline.
(Pineal stimulation may resolve some sexual
and erectile dysfunction issues ... more needed on this).
Coaching the Amygdala
The amygdala is a part of the limbic brain that associates emotions with symbols.
The amygdala receives information from the neocortex, and integrates
sensory information from both the external (objective) and internal
(subjective) worlds, resulting in experiences that people call “reality”.
The limbic brain also mediates speech
intonation and metaphor. Coaching strategies that communicate directly with the limbic
brain are interactive metaphors and symbolic integration. As the limbic
brain responds emotionally to symbols, such as icons, mandalas and art, people
can use symbols to stimulate their limbic brains.
The amygdala has been called the heart of the limbic brain.
If you take a moment and recall the bitter taste and smell of lemon juice
... what happens to your saliva flow? Your amygdala
rapidly responds as if the imagined events were actually taking place.
By stimulating the amygdala, we can better coach people to explore strategies for
achieving worthwhile goals, and to reduce the emotional impact of trauma. I help
motivated people learn from traumatic, phobic or abusive events without being overwhelmed by
emotions; which helps people evaluate and assimilate traumatic or
Coaching and Synesthesia
We often use synesthesia to help people 'unhook' heavy
emotions. Coaching at the limbic level helps people interpret unpleasant
feelings as communication, without being overwhelmed by sensations
such as rage, guilt or anxiety. This is very useful for people who want
to resolve psychosomatic symptoms, in
which emotions seem to be expressed or communicated as body problems.
Synesthesia is an experience in
which the stimulation of one sense elicits a perception that ordinarily
would be elicited had another sense been stimulated, as when a noise
registers as a light, or vice versa
: Encyclopedia Encarta
As the limbic system also attributes meaning to music,
speech intonations and metaphors, we can communicate directly
with the limbic brain by changing the tempo, tone and pitch of our
voices, and by using interactive metaphors, music and symbols. (Many people
find symbolic or metaphoric maps to be useful when evaluating
their histories, relationships and goals during our coaching sessions.)
Coaching the Hind Brain (Cerebellum)
The hind-brain also translates body-mind communication. It is
sometimes called the reptilian hind-brain and it controls everyday repetitive
behaviors such as habits, rituals, routines and motor skills. (You might think
of it as an auto-pilot when you are daydreaming - even if driving a motor vehicle.
I sometimes call it the inner lizard).
The hind-brain associates emotions with action (action can be called
honest communication). People communicate aggression, submission
and sexual interest through their often-unconscious body movements and
Like the limbic system, your hind-brain responds to metaphors and symbols.
Hence interactive metaphors, symbolic language, puns and non-verbal
signals can communicate with this part of the brain. This is
useful when coaching people to pull themselves together as they
assimilate parts that were split off during trauma.
Coaching the Adrenal Glands
The adrenal glands are not in the brain - they are above the
kidneys. They guide the famous fight or flight response to
stress. Healthy adrenal glands release adrenaline, which
causes people to feel alert and focused, and cortisol, which
converts proteins into energy. Adrenalin also
increases the heart rate, respiration and blood pressure while tensing muscles,
sharpening senses and slowing digestion perhaps so that people can better
fight or run away.
Chronic stress may cause the adrenal glands to maintain high cortisol
levels, which can damage body tissues. Some people say they have
adrenaline addiction; although adrenal fatigue is related
mood swings - depression, fatigue and insomnia. Adrenal exhaustion can cause
serious health concerns and mental breakdown.
The adrenal glands respond to limbic neurotransmitters which are affected by metaphors and symbols.
Hence interactive metaphors, symbolic language, puns and non-verbal
signals can affect these glands. This is useful for disconnecting fight or
flight reactions during coaching sessions, especially with angry or fearful
Online Life Coaching,
Counseling & Soulwork Therapy
...... Page 3 could start here .....
A Psychobiology of Love
Falling in love can feel profoundly wonderful; while falling out of love
can bring profound suffering. Our brains change when we are in love, in similar
ways to some mental illnesses or the effects of psychoactive drugs. Falling in love can be
addictive, and falling out of love can trigger withdrawal symptoms that are similar to
those associated with addictive drugs!
Hard-core science focuses on what can
be easily measured, and may not appreciate nor include important aspects of
human existence such as personality, beliefs and values.
Kosjenka Muk, Soulwork Trainer
Falling in love seems to have three phases, each
accompanied by hormones and neurotransmitters
- Lust is associated with estrogen
and testosterone (affects men and women).
- Attraction is associated with dopamine and
serotonin. People in love may feel obsessed - they may
eat less, sleep less and day-dream about someone.
- Attachment is associated with vasopressin and
oxytocin, which supports lasting commitment and helps bond lovers
There's convincing evidence
that oxytocin is involved in mediating stability, pair bonding
and monogamy; the enduring parts of love ... Hans Zingg, McGill
Many people experience a surge of oxytocin bonding during
extended touch, for example during sex or massage, and a surge of dopamine
during arousing activities. Both trigger feelings of love and romance,
but as dopamine gives a feeling of pleasure or satisfaction (see
a desire for more satisfaction motivates behaviors that release more dopamine
... for example food, sex and displays of power ...
People who are unusually willing to manipulate others
for personal gain - such as psychopaths - have unusually high levels of
dopamine, a chemical that motivates people to seek pleasure. Joshua
Buckholz, Nature Neuroscience, DOl: 10.1038/nn.251O
Buckholtz suggests that a strong desire for dopamine
stimulation can motivate
people to act impulsively, without considering
the consequences of their actions.
Hence love can be addictive (probably to forms of
amphetamine-like adrenaline), and falling in love can have
symptoms similar to substance abuse. Falling out of love can have
symptoms comparable to withdrawal from addictive drugs (adrenaline),
perhaps accompanied by a dopamine-driven urge to regain the lost love
and/or to express power over the ex-lover.
A Psychobiology of Soul
When balanced in harmony, the various parts of our brains can function and
communicate simultaneously ... and ecstatically. We can enjoy a stable
experience of integrity as a basis for congruent decisions and long-term
People experiencing this integration display verbal
congruence and nonverbal symmetry, which may indicate that the both
cranial hemispheres, limbic system, amygdala and hind-brain are in an unusual
state of cooperation.
During this experience, people can simultaneously focus
on abstract concepts and on details. Many people describe a
transcendental awareness. (As many people called this experience Soul,
I called this part of my coaching Soul-work. The name stuck.)
I asked you for coaching to plan a new business ... and now I
have a sense of mission and almost transcendent life purpose! I can focus on
achieving this goal without losing anything ... the beliefs that slowed me down
were parts of me that were concerned that my project might damage my
relationships with my husband or children ... I feel I have communicated with my
Soul ... I am a complete person ... it's impossible to describe ... London
Many people, during and after Soul experience,
have told us that Soul has an independent existence; that Soul
existed before they were born; and that Soul will somehow continue after
the death of their bodies. (Psychobiology cannot confirm or disprove this
Some of our graduates believe that our coaching
can enable or enhance spiritual connectedness – while others believe that
Soul experience is a normal result of integrated brain activity.
Whatever is true, what we call Soul experience seems to provide
a rational basis for significant body-mind healing in short time frames.
Some People Cannot Experience Integrity (Soul)
In 1998 I wrote that about 25% of people cannot experience this
existential harmony without first making some changes. The main reasons seemed to be:
immaturity (lack of responsibility),
(preoccupied), guilt (need to suffer) and
(independent happiness may damage an important relationship). Also common are
people who suffered long term dissociation
(lost identity), had identified with
another person (identification) or
had identified with two people
We developed relationship coaching strategies for quickly dissolving
these issues. They work. While this appears to help reduce aging, increase
resistance to disease, and offer potential solutions for psychosomatic
illness and autoimmune diseases, my overall goal remains to support
people to live fulfilled lives.
Please consult a physician
about medical conditions!
Since I wrote this article (15 years ago!) my colleagues and I
have improved our coaching methodology and changed our paradigms.
I have not incorporated our recent work into this article ... which
could easily become a book!
While we expected people to welcome fast, effective change ... most
people seem to remain loyal to their conditioning and cling to their
suffering. Most people seeking relief from emotional and
relationship problems prefer to medicate or distract themselves.
Are you searching for sense of life - without drugs?
Are you searching for integrity? Explore our transformational coaching.
Online Life Coaching,
Counseling & Soulwork Therapy
I thought you were just
another therapist - but you were not just. Not even. Not only.
Plagiarism is theft. Copyright © Martyn Carruthers
1998-2013 All rights reserved