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Are you or your partner entangled in difficult
relationships or painful emotions? Do either of you struggle with unresolved trauma?
Do either of you suffer from your parents' drama, your children's demands, your
boss's moods? Do you want to untangle
your lives ... as you reclaim your freedom ... together?
Should you stay together?
Is your marriage or partnership in trouble? Or is it good and
you want to make it even better? Our unique couple coaching can help
you decide whether or not to start a partnership, whether or not to get married, whether
or not to continue your relationship - and whether or not to separate.
Systems Coaching
Key ingredients of good partnership include understanding,
love, acceptance, gratitude, responsibility and teamwork. Systemic individual coaching
can help you solve individual issues and prepare for happy partnership. Systemic
couple coaching can help you resolve partnership problems, while systemic
family coaching can help you solve problems with children,
in-laws, and other family challenges.
Do you stay in a partnership out of despair and depression?
Do you feel trapped? Do you pray for your partner to change? Do you consider
or try sexual affairs? Do you hope to be rescued? Or do you want to change your
relationship habits and build your partnership on
integrity for lasting happiness?
[ Couple
Coaching Flowchart & Testimonial ] [
Couple Communication Exercises ]
Your good intentions may not survive your partnership challenges.
We can coach you to evaluate
and change your relationships - and your relationship habits. We can help
you and your partner express your love, build your commitment and share your
partnership skills.
We can help you understand and
validate each other's history, perspectives, beliefs and values,
as a basis for a caring relationship which supports you both. We can coach you
to coach each other.
[ Enjoying
Partnership ] [
Systemic Couple Coaching ]
Put ELATION in your Relationship
How do you love each other?
Your relationship depends on how you both express love
for each other. Insincere or withheld love may not survive the tests
of everyday reality. Does one of you not commit to partnership because
of bad habits, entangled relationships,
confused habits or dissociated emotions? Your feeling of love may
not be enough - a happy partnership needs partnership skills.
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I wanted to get away from my parents.
This man was rich ... and much older than me ... I pretended to enjoy sex with
him and got pregnant and married him ... he flirted
with my friends, my son was sick ... I was only 23
and my doctor made me take anti-depressants. Then we came for Soulwork. It's
like a different world. We have a new start. Miami, Florida |
Can relationship coaching solve your problems?
How long do you wait before you seek
help? Do you wait until your suffering reaches PANIC? By then, you
may be too late. You may alienate your partner or become dependent
on some drug. The earlier you get systemic relationship coaching
- the more likely that we can help you.
Do you both want to solve relationship problems? Or do you
create relationship problems to motivate separation? If you or your partner is somehow
sabotaging your partnership, your situation may seem unsolvable and your separation
inevitable - unless you both want intimacy and long-term commitment.
[
Counterfeit Love ] [ Sexual
Issues ] [ Sexual
Solutions ]
Systemic couple coaching can help you and your partner
resolve old arguments; financial problems, boredom and frustration. If
both of you can commit to evaluating
your partnership, and if both of you are emotionally mature - budgets can be
made, boredom can be reversed and arguments can become stimulating
conversations.
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I heard good things about your work ... you
also coach gay partners ... my partner and I have been together five years ...
you helped us choose the shape of our relationship ... and plan what we will
do when my HIV positive partner gets AIDS. |
If either one of you rejects possibilities for
reconciliation, then indifference, affairs or separation may seem
inevitable. Although we provide separation and divorce coaching - many
would be divorcees find new and better ways to love each other. We have
coached many couples to transform their lives.
[ Affairs ]
[ Dependency ]
[ Space for Love ] [
Triangulation ]
Your partner is not perfect
And neither are you. Many people who separate are motivated by
fantasies. You may imagine that somewhere - a more perfect person awaits you.
Or, your partner wants to make a change (e.g. new job, new house or traveling)
that you feel would exclude you; or one of you has an
affair; or one of
you changes your priorities. Relationship crises are predictable - and
preventable - and we can help you.
[
Predictable Partnership ] [
Premarital Coaching ] [ Hawaiian
Wedding ]
Do either of you confuse relationship requirements
with an ultimatum, manipulation or emotional blackmail. None of
these require separation or divorce - they require careful
evaluation to find out what happened, why it happened and how to
effectively deal with similar issues in the future.
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I married a perfect woman.
She was clever, rich and gorgeous ... we had a wonderful time ... at her father's
expense. But when her dad had money problems, we both had to
work and we argued every day. Soulwork helped us a lot ... we
don't have fancy cars and expensive holidays now, but we are adult partners ... not
adult children! Sussex, UK |
Couples Coaching Couples
We can coach you to evaluate and improve your
partnership - and your relationships with family, ex-partners, friends
and colleagues. Where possible, we (Martyn and Teresa) work together to help
you gain certainty and dissolve doubts; and to make
decisions about the shape of your life together.
[
Systemic Couple Coaching ] [ Systemic
Divorce Coaching ]
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I married a man with an adult daughter
living with him. My husband puts her before me and I live in my bedroom.
My step-daughter lies about me and fights for her fathers attention.
Although I really love my husband, I
will leave him if he doesn't change this situation. |
If you do not solve partnership problems quickly - you may
destroy potentially-wonderful relationships. Your expressions of love can
become bogged down in
emotional incest, passive-aggression,
depression,
codependence - or worse. Why wait for
worse? Why wait at all? Contact us.
Evaluating Partnership
Soulwork couple coaching can help you evaluate and clarify
your intimate or working relationships. When couples coach couples, you can
enjoy a new start, as you learn to appreciate each other and share your
highest values. Happy partnerships
requires that partners agree on many details about their relationship.
You can find
agreement and harmony with Soulwork couple coaching.
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Good couple coaching can help you both
evaluate whether or not your core values and goals are compatible, and if both
of you want the same type of relationship. This evaluation can transcend
personal advantages, sexual attraction and manipulation - exposing real human
beings and real dreams of happiness. We can
help you increase and express love in everyday life.
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[
Acceptance & Gratitude in Partnership ]
Partnership Agreements
Are either of you entangled with other people? Systemic couple
coaching can help you untangle from parents, ex-partners and other people. Systemic
relationship coaching may lead to peaceful separation-coaching if one or both
partners prefer to stay entangled in
previous relationships. If you
want happiness together, we can
coach you both make a foundation for a new life!
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Overview of Systemic 8: Couple Coach Training
For Systemic Coaches, Relationship Coaches, Marriage Counselors,
Family Therapists etc
Enjoying Partnership is for
partners who both want a committed long-term partnership together.
If either partner is not fully committed to a
long-term relationship, individual systemic coaching
for both partners is recommended first.
Required individual coaching skills: dissolving objections,
relationship diagnosis, clarification, goalwork, interactive metaphors,
relationship bonds, trauma resolution & dissolve mentor damage.
Required systemic coaching skills: Relationship Matrix,
Couple Reframing, Couple Mirror, Double Vision, Conjoint Conflict Resolution and
Dissolving Transference Loops.
- Check if one or both partners object to being together or to
potential changes
- Coach partners to understand each others' relationship goals and
reactions
- Dissolve impasses, objections, conflicts and transference loops
- Dissolve entanglements with parents, siblings and past-partners etc
- Repeat until both partners can resourcefully discuss and plan
relationship goals
- Coach partners to solve real-life blocks & challenges resourcefully
- Repeat steps 3-6 until the partners can solve real-life challenges
by themselves
- Get out of their way and provide occasional mentorship
for difficult situations
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Sharing thoughts and feelings is relationship first aid. We coach partners
to make clear and peaceful decisions. If you decide to separate, we
can help you dissolve relationship bonds and repair shattered dreams
in a peaceful separation. If you decide to stay together, even for a trial
period, our systemic couple coaching can accelerate your healthy partnership.
Contact us.
Copyright © Martyn Carruthers 1998, 2008 All rights reserved
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Training Partners :
Relationship Coaching
: Coach Training
: Specialty Training :
Corporate :
FAQ
or
telephone: +4 860 275 8295 or +38 591 585 0365