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It's easier to use drugs as a substitute for change.
Self-medication with alcohol or nicotine, or prescription
anti-depressants and stimulants
are easier than applying intelligence
and analytical skills to complex relationship issues.
Drugs are cheaper for patients (in the short term) and more profitable
for health professionals.
The potential consequences of ignoring relationship
problems together with the side-effects
of addictive and psychoactive
drugs are unacceptable to an increasing number of people.
What is Fatigue?
Fatigue refers to a sensation of tiredness, weariness,
exhaustion, weakness, or low energy. Fatigue is a symptom of many diseases,
disorders and conditions. Fatigue can result from infection, inflammation,
trauma, malignancy, chronic diseases, autoimmune diseases, mental illnesses,
dehydration, electrolyte imbalances and other processes.
Elderly people and ill people more often experience fatigue.
Fatigue can be short-term, such as after exertion or a sleepless night, or
chronic and persistent, if it is due to depression or heart failure.
Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS) refers to long-term
persistent or frequent fatigue. The definition of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome
by the United States Centers for Disease Control and Prevention requires that
two criteria be fulfilled (from Wikipedia, 2010):
- A new onset (not lifelong) of unexplained, persistent
fatigue unrelated to exertion and not substantially relieved by rest, that
causes a significant reduction in previous activity levels.
- Four or more of the following symptoms that last
six months or longer:
* Impaired memory or concentration
* Post-exertion malaise, with "extreme, prolonged exhaustion
and sickness"
* Unrefreshing sleep
* Muscle pain (myalgia)
* Pain in multiple joints (arthralgia)
* Headaches of a new kind or greater severity
* Tender lymph nodes (cervical or axillary)
Fatigue is a symptom of many different conditions, and some of
them are potentially serious. A thorough medical evaluation is needed to ensure
an accurate diagnosis of the reason for the fatigue.
Therefore we strongly recommend that people with symptoms of
persistent fatigue consult their physicians to check for treatable illnesses,
such as sleep disorders, depression, alcohol/substance abuse, diabetes,
hypothyroidism, mononucleosis (mono), lupus, multiple sclerosis, hepatitis and
malignancies. Also, some medications may have side effects that mimic
symptoms of chronic fatigue.
How is Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS) treated?
Currently (2001), the cause of chronic fatigue syndrome
remains unknown. CFS is medically diagnosed by excluding known illnesses
with similar symptoms. This method of diagnosis cannot confirm that a person
has CFS and not some other fatigue-causing disorder, such as
depression, anxiety or
lupus.
At this time there is no acknowledged cure for CFS
and its symptoms vary. Over time some people become worse, some experience
partial improvement and others recover completely. We noticed that some
symptoms of lasting fatigue vanish during our relationship coaching.
Of course we wondered why.
We suggest that symptoms that are no longer needed,
that cease to serve a function, may disappear, providing that irreplaceable body
tissues have not deteriorated or been damaged. We also suggest that the
subjective need for symptoms may be based on distorted memories,
strange beliefs and illusions.
From our systemic perspective, the symptoms associated with
chronic or persistent fatigue may make sense if a person is depressed, living a
life that lacks sense, or if the symptoms provide benefits (e.g. getting
attention from family members or maintaining disability payments).
Meaning of
Life ...
Burnout ... Nervous Breakdown
Possible Solutions for Symptoms of Chronic Fatigue
We help people explore the possible benefits
of persistent or chronic fatigue. Does fatigue help a person avoid a hated
job? Does fatigue make a person into a victim that holds a family
together? Does fatigue seem to balance the high energy of a very active
partner? We explore the advantages of fatigue.
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I suffered
chronic fatigue syndrome for twelve years and was told that it was
incurable. I heard about Martyn's work from a good friend, and flew to
meet him for private coaching.
Within a month or so, many of my
CFS symptoms seemed to evaporate, and I planned to return to my
career as an international trainer. But after three months
I was on the edge of divorce. My regained high energy was not
so wonderful for my older, retired husband. After a crisis, my
husband and I found ways in which I could be energetic
and he could be retired and we could
stay married. Florence, Italy |
We help people discover if
relationship entanglements
or identity loss require chronic fatigue
(or if there is a significant age difference
between partners).
Do any family members also suffer from chronic fatigue? Is there survival guilt
following the death of a family member or close friend? Does chronic
fatigue enable an important relationship (like marriage) to continue?
Chronic Fatigue & Identity Loss
We coach people to explore what they truly
want create plans to fulfill those goals. We help people decide which
relationships need attention and which life goals are critical. Although
each person is unique, we follow a general strategy that reflects how
many healthy people deal with life challenges.
By identity loss we imply that people can lose access to
parts of themselves ... fragments of self that were typically dissociated
during some crisis or relationship disappointment ... but never re-associated.
It seems that most people have dissociated parts (part of me wants to but
part of me doesn't).
Simple identity loss can
lead to unexpected or illogical behaviors, while complex identity loss can
have existential effects. For us, Identification refers to the
long-term expression of another personality (think of medieval ideas of
spirit possession), Lost Identity refers to chronic dissociated
behavior (think of classic ideas of nervous breakdown), and
Identity Conflict refers to long-term bipolar mood swings (think
of classic ideas of split personality).
- Identification - I am identified
with somebody or something
- Lost Identity - I have little or no
sense of self, and few or no emotions
- Identity Conflict - My personality
changes back and forth between conflicting sides
- Relationship Bonds - How I must behave to allow important relationships to continue
We teach solutions for Lost Identity,
Identification & Identity Conflict in our
Systems 6
training.
Lost Identity
.
Identity Conflict .
Identification .
Identity Bonds
Chronic Fatigue & Relationship Bonds
Relationship bonds (sometimes called limiting
identity beliefs, schema or personality disorders)
refer to stable limiting beliefs or fixed ideas about one's own
identity or about the world generally. Unpleasant or limiting relationship bonds appear
to compensate for injustice or abuse.
Such bonds seem to allow children to survive
relationship disappointments. Children who perceive that a family
member is stupid or dangerous, the children may compensate for those
family members by creating limiting beliefs about
themselves that allows that important relationships to continue.
Many people appear to cling to limiting beliefs. If awareness
of a belief-bond and the relationship events which created them can damage
an important relationship, people may (unknowingly) avoid this awareness.
Willpower, cognitive understanding and
logical arguments are unlikely to change bonded feelings and beliefs,
although they may help people change some behaviors for a short time.
Consult a physician about any opinions or
recommendations about medical conditions.
We help people find solutions for emotional
blocks and relationship problems.
Online
Coaching for Chronic Fatigue
Plagiarism is theft. Copyright © Martyn Carruthers 2001-2011 All rights reserved
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