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We offer coaching and training on relationship happiness,
resolving family chaos and sorting out many issues of sexuality.
Sex & Motivation
Human motivation and creativity profoundly reflect human
sexuality. We help people become emotionally
mature, find healthy partners, become good parents, protect children and
assist children to become independent. We also coach adults to unblock their
sexuality.
As sexuality reaches almost every part of life, any issue
connected to sexuality will likely generate emotional and political controversy.
Also, while pornography and masturbation are often called victimless crimes,
we find that the victims of pornography are the partners and future children
of sex addicts; the children who will find themselves burdened with
sexual blocks.
Repression predates Obsession
After millennia of sexual repression, many people are obsessed with sex, and
express sexual behavior chaotically. For us, deviant sexual obsessions include
urges to control the sexual expressions of other people. Megalomaniacs know that
if you can control people's sexual behavior - you control them utterly.
Sex is often a forbidden obsession. Murder, robbery, pollution, corruption
and wasted resources are acceptable themes for TV and cinema for young
audiences, while some people obsessively strive to censor and control
expressions of human sexuality.
The hypocrisy can be stunning. An exposed female breast during a football
game can outrage a nation that supplies most of the world's pornography, a nation
in which carrying guns is legal and where murder is acceptable children's
television viewing.
In emotional climates in which children cannot discuss and assimilate
thoughts, emotions and motivations about sex, those children may have to deal
with obsessions during and following adolescence. The possibility
of delayed sexual dysfunction is high for children who have been taught to
associate sexual thoughts or behavior with dirtiness, guilt, punishment or
disgrace.
Stress Disorders .
Divorce and Children .
Parent Alienation
Systemic Solutions
Sexual pleasure is now or will likely become a topic of importance to you and to
those with whom you share significant relationships. The quality of your sexual
relationships has great impact on your self-image and on your partnership. Any
physical, psychological or emotional changes affect your relationships. Issues
of sexuality can be addressed and resolved during the short and long-term.
Our relationship coaching can include
the expression of sexuality in the following general forms:
- Sexual Happiness
- Sexual Harassment by Health Professionals
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Sexual Dysfunction: Impotence and Frigidity
- Sexual Abuse
- Solutions for Sexual Abuse
- Sexual health issues are also described at Sexual
Solutions.
We support and encourage people to achieve goals and resolve problems. We can
provide coaching, exercises, homework to assist people through difficult situations.
We also offer pre-abortion and post-abortion coaching to help people avoid
the unpleasant consequences of abortion.
Relationship Diagnosis & Sexual Addictions
Relationship diagnosis is important for resolving sexual
addictions. Many sexual issues involve obsessions - often to childhood fantasies
about parents and family members, about unrequited love and about past-partners.
Many adults cling to fantasies from adolescence or early
adulthood ... we find that such fantasies can
damage later intimate relationships. We can coach people to dissolve
old fantasies and refocus on their current or potential sexual partners.
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I am 64 and I have never married. You asked
me if I was ever in love, and I told you about my teenage romance. You asked me
if I had ever let go of that girl - and no - I never did. I have always felt her
in my arms - always beautiful - always wanting to ... play. I was shocked to
realize that holding on to her stopped me being intimate with a real woman.
Chicago, USA |
We identify if a person is in crisis, and then make a relationship
diagnosis. We address issues of guilt, mentor damage and conflicts, as we help people
define goals with integrity. We coach people to resolve relationship bonds and
emotional trauma, resolve old fantasies, and provide mentorship.
What is Sex Addiction?
Sexual addiction can include many activities: excessive masturbation,
internet pornography, using prostitutes, voyeurism, exhibitionism, multiple
sexual affairs, serial relationships, and other sexual behavior. Casual behavior
becomes an addiction if you repeat the activity without control, even when
you suffer unpleasant consequences.
Do you use sexuality as an escape from boredom or as a way to
feel good? Sex can become an attempt to compensate for pain and feeling
unworthy. Over time, sexual behavior may show the damaging consequences of
addiction: preoccupation, compulsive behavior, despair and
depression.
Are you a Sex Addict?
Has your work, education or relationships suffered
because of your sexual fantasies or activities? Do you live a double life?
Some signs are:
- Do you keep secrets about your sexual life from people you love?
- Do you feel compelled to have sex repeatedly in a
short time frame?
- Does your need for sex cause you to visit places you would
prefer to avoid?
- Do your sexual practices harm your happiness, social
life, or sense of reality?
- Are you unable to stop your sexual behavior despite unpleasant
consequences?
- Do you spend inordinate time obtaining sex, being sexual, or
recovering from sex?
- Do you want to get away from a sex partner after sex?
Do you feel shame or guilt?
We help people change destructive sexual urges and find healthy ways to
enjoy life. We help people change sexual compulsions and addictions -
rapidly and usually with humor.
Sexual Harassment at Work
Sexuality in the workplace is a very touchy subject, and the number of
lawsuits concerning sexual harassment are continually increasing.
We often offer Team Coaching at a retreat where a team can be
together with minimal disturbances, or at the workplace. It is often cost-effective
to invite a Soulwork Trainer to join an annual meeting or conference. We can
offer a package of short workshops, team coaching and individual coaching sessions,
usually over 2-5 days, often with a follow-up day after about 4-6 weeks.
Lesbians, Bisexual and Gay
Some women strive to fulfill their emotional needs and sexual desires through
other women. Many women seek non-sexual intimate relationships with other
women. And some women do not act upon their desires, yet fantasize lesbian activity.
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I taught a few psychology classes at U of
Nevada in Las Vegas. While there, I met people with sexual preferences that I
had heard of ... and some that I had never heard of. Overall, I met some
fascinating people, and it takes a lot more to surprise me now. Martyn |
Some men seek other men for sexual pleasure. Whether this
started as a search for a substitute for father or for an aborted brother or to
avoid dark associations with mother, homosexual men are increasingly coming
out of the closet, which may distress people who uphold certain religious
dogma.
We have not met homosexual people who wanted to change their
sexual orientation to heterosexual. These people often seek a sense of wholeness within
real or imagined relationships with other people of the same sex. Human couples have
predictable problems, not matter their sexual orientation ... we can provide both
individual and couple coaching for gay and lesbian couples.
While few people want to change their sexual orientation, we can help
women redefine and fulfill their relationship goals with their
mothers, sisters, daughters etc - and with other women.
Couple Coaching
We offer individual and couple coaching where we
delicately coach people to dissolve emotional, relationship and sexual problems.
We don't give advice on your sexual choices with consenting adults - presuming
that you do not hurt children - rather we can coach you to
resolve emotional blocks and relationship issues.
Each stage of sexual arousal may be sabotaged - internally or externally. The
stages of sexual response typically follow a period of flirtation and romantic
preparedness. Without a period or romantic verbal foreplay, any sexual foreplay
may be rebuffed - or sex may become businesslike, without romance and intimacy -
which some people prefer.
You need not be alone as you ponder your way through a sexual labyrinth. Sex
is not bad, wrong or disgusting - it's an essential part of human relationships
that has been terribly distorted for centuries. When you have suffered enough, we can
help you find emotional maturity at the end of
your maze.
Enjoying Partnership .
Evaluating Partnership .
Predictable Partnership
Consult your physician about
any opinions or recommendations concerning sexual health, medical symptoms
or medical conditions.
We can help most motivated adults, from a teenager
addicted to sex; a working mother who cares for a disabled parent; a
single parent who copes with an ADD child; a college student who struggles
with anorexia; a young adult who suffers from mental illness; a partner who
mourns the death of a spouse; a family that seeks to solve conflict; and
couples who want to improve their partnerships.
Would you like to
benefit from our experience?
Copyright Martyn Carruthers 2004-2010
All rights reserved |
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