Some people feel physical pain, while other people with the same stimulus feel comfortable. Pain responses seem to be mostly learned in early childhood as a part of family and cultural responses. Many children learn to suppress and hide difficult feelings such sadness, fear and anger and may also learned to hide pain, for example when parents react angrily about their crying. Other children find that by expressing pain, they gain more attention or love.

Pain is difficult to measure, and may be affected by stress, fear and anxiety. Pain responses often include raised blood pressure and increased heart rate. Differences in pain response are mostly due to social, cultural, psychological and genetic factors.

Pain often follows stress and suffering. Pain may be delayed or lessened in severity if a person better controls external stress and his or her internal reactions to Stress. See also Emotional Intelligence.

Acute & Chronic Pain

Acute pain includes immediate, usually short-term, intense body responses, often connected with depressed feelings, followed by a dull, throbbing sensations.

Chronic pain includes long-term (often defined as having persisted for at least 6 months), intense, often throbbing sensation. Chronic pain is often associated with medical diagnoses of cancer, multiple sclerosis or arthritis. It is more difficult to locate and treat. Chronic pain can significantly alter the life of a person, sometimes leading to secondary complications such as hypochondria, depression, sleep disturbances, loss of appetite and feelings of helplessness.

Pain control can be achieved using chemicals that interfere with the transmission of painful signals, with the reception of painful signals, or with the interpretation of painful signals. The most powerful pain control medications are opiates (e.g. morphine and heroin) and the most common are salicylates (e.g. aspirin and acetaminophen). Other medications commonly used during pain control include antidepressants and tranquilizers. Many pain medications may only be prescribed by licensed physicians.

Some herbal remedies contain medications similar to medical drugs, usually obtained from natural sources rather than artificially constructed.

Alcohol is a traditional pain-medication in many cultures, often used in conjunction with herbs or nicotine (tobacco) - a powerful alkaloid that helps people dissociate.

Placebo (inert substances that look like drugs) are often more effective in pain control than any drug, as shown in clinical double-blind trials...

We offer a multidisciplinary approach to pain. You can create a "resourceful space" to find freedom from pain, and to make decisions which may solve the problems that cause pain. You can become active in your pain assessment and control.

Do you use pain control drugs with little success and/or with unpleasant side-effects? You can learn to decrease your reliance on drugs by learning how to control pain. (These skills have enormous value in crisis and emergency situations.)

If you cannot alleviate your pain, you may experience distress, depression or anxiety. These may worsen both your condition and the situation for other involved people. Most people can control pain without drugs. Pain control coaching is often most appropriate for:

1. People with chronic or recurring pain
2. People who have incomplete pain relief from medication
3. People with a history of adverse reactions to medication
4. People who wish to avoid medication
5. People with prolonged postoperative pain

If you lack meaningful relationships, any increased attention, sympathy or support that you receive as a result of your pain may motivate you to prolong your painful behavior, so that you may continue receiving relationship benefits. See Depression and Anxiety (Also Side Effects of Medication )

Please consult your physician regarding the applicability of any opinions or recommendations with respect to pain, medical symptoms or medical conditions.

Pain provides a message that something is wrong. If you receive a painful message and act upon it, further pain may be unnecessary. It is important that you find out what is happening before using pain control techniques. Our systemic coaching supplements medical treatment; but cannot replace it.

We may encourage initial "short-term" pain relief to create a resourceful space for you to follow the steps needed for longer-term relief. Short term pain control may involve non-psychoactive medication, massage, acupuncture and/or hypnosis. ( Summary of short-term pain relief )

1. The first goal of long-term pain relief is often to coach you to deal with current crisis. Further pain control steps may be useless until you end or control any crisis. A crisis may include the shock of an accident, a medical test, an emergency, or suffering about a relationship.
2. How does your pain makes sense? Explore the causes and benefits of your pain, and ways to preserve any benefits while relieving the symptoms.
3. Resolve any relationship chaos, especially relationships in which you suffer or feel guilt.
4. Resolve any conflicts about pain and its relief, while becoming specific about what you want instead of pain - and for what purpose.
5. Resolve relationship bonds that require pain. This is particularly important if you have a family history of people with chronic or recurring pain.
6. Deal with emotional trauma. Anger, fear and sadness inhibit concentration and relaxation, and may increase pain. We can coach you to explore any emotions associated with your pain. Some common issues are: anger about some person or event, sadness about lost opportunities, fear of unending pain and fear of death.
7. Find appropriate mentors. Some of the better mentors for pain control are people with similar, but worse, situations to you, who generally have a positive attitude. We can coach you to:

•   focus on NOW to eliminate remembered pain and anticipated pain
•  trust that your body will create endorphins that protect your body functions
•  learn progressive relaxation to assist your nervous, circulatory and immune systems
•  create pain-free moments - and then minutes - and then hours ... and then ...

We request approval from a medical doctor before we commence pain control coaching. We refer people wanting pain control who have not had a recent medical examination to a local physician.

Do you want relationship coaching or systemic coach training? Do you want better relationships or to coach individuals, partners and teams to resolve relationship challenges?