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We offer private coaching sessions and interactive training on
systemic coaching, relationship happiness, resolving family chaos and
emotional freedom. Contact us.
What is Soulwork?
Soulwork systemic coaching includes a philosophy and
methodology for coaching human development, in which
people can choose life goals, and change life, based on a stable
experience of integrated connectedness. We call this experience integrity or
"Soul" - the basis of Soulwork systemic coaching.
We describe the theory and applications of systemic coaching in
many articles at www.soulwork.net. The roots of
Soulwork include traditional Polynesian healing (huna kalani), particularly the two
groups of rituals known collectively as ho’oponopono and ho’omanamana.
These rituals were explored using expert modeling and were compared and contrasted
with concepts from psychotherapy, particularly with Ericksonian hypnotherapy,
Logotherapy and systemic family therapy. See Roots of Soulwork
What is NLP?
NLP is an epistemology for evaluating subjective experience,
particularly in the modeling and duplication of performance. NLP provides useful
methods for eliciting unconscious strategies and coding subjective experience
for Expert Modeling. NLP could be called brief, goal-oriented cognitive
coaching. It includes an awareness of consequences of change (personal ecology). See NLP Ecology
Redefined.
What is Huna Kalani?
Polynesian traditions are often referred to as
Huna, (translation: "hidden"). Ho’oponopono (my
translation: making relationships right) is a healing tradition
still used by native Hawaiians.
| Soulwork originated in part during an attempt to use NLP
to model and translate Huna Kalani into a format appropriate for haole
Westerners . As I began to understand the
psychotherapeutic healing techniques used by native Hawaiians, I expanded and
modified the NLP tool set to incorporate information from these unusual frames of
reference. The modified tool set better allowed the modeling of mystical and
relationship experience. During this, the Hawaiian healing techniques seemed to
transform. Seemingly esoteric rituals and ancient concepts became useful models for
effective relationship coaching. |
Soulwork through NLP Filters
Our systemic coaching operates at the
logical level of Identity, answering the question "Who am I?" with a
profound experience - a meta-identity - a stable, pre-verbal experience of
multi-level connectedness. In Soulwork, this experience is called integrity.
Interactive access to this often-ecstatic experience seems to be
required to effect long term beneficial change at the level of Identity. (By
beneficial I mean in keeping with a person's long term happiness and sense of
life). A person can
resolve major guilt, co-dependent relationships, post-traumatic stress (PTSD) and
current crisis. This person can then, through a deep
analysis of goals, follow a sequence of meta-positions of increasing abstraction
to find this pre-verbal experience.
Soulwork through Huna Eyes
A kumu can utilize a hidden
structure of creation, called Kumulipo, mediated by the aumakua,
or family spirits. This requires the blessing of the person's ohana or
community-family and of the the person's kupuna – elders and
ancestors - including those who may be dead. The goal is that a person
aligns with family energies and connects with pono
(righteousness) and aloha, the unseen love-energy of creation.
As this alignment is not possible if a person has "lost" his or her
uhane (spirit), or if a spirit of one or more other people have displaced a
person’s own spirit, "spirit-retrievals" may be made.
The first step to health is kala
(cleansing forgiveness) leading to conscious connection with aumakua
(Soul) – using ho’omanamana (energy work) to access the wisdom of
kumulipo (universal creativity) to ho’oponopono
(change relationships). Next
follows a re-evaluation of ele’ele eke (past traumatic events –
literally "black bags") and a re-evaluation of all kupuna
(teachers) from a basis of aloha (love).
Why do some people need coaching?
Some people lack motivation, or do not know
how to change. People who cannot change include those with little internal
rapport, those negatively influenced by other persons, those without resourceful
internal reference and those with unhealthy life models.
Soulwork systemic coaching follows an overall strategy:
Dissolve guilt, resolve
dependent, codependent and entangled relationships Define goals, dissolve objections,
resolve conflicts; create plans Resolve Identity Blocks: Lost Identity, Identifications and/or
Identity Conflict Find and stabilize integrity or Soul (the reference for subsequent
changework) Relationships - evaluate significant relationship bonds and influences
Trauma - replace traumatic memories with resourceful internal
references Role Models - evaluate, replace and choose life mentors
Soulwork & NLP Rapport
We accept and uses a person’s
objections to increase trust. Conscious and unconscious objections are
responded to courteously, as a basis for the profound trust needed to discuss,
explore and change existential issues. Soulwork dissolves objections,
transferences, arguments, criticism and conflicts to deserve
trust.
NLP rapport is largely based on mirroring non-verbal behavior,
to "lead" another person to a state that a NLP
Practitioner considers appropriate for the operator's goals. A common NLP definition
of rapport is "unconditional acceptance of suggestion".
Soulwork compared to NLP Well Formed Outcome
Few people can complete an accurate and grammatically correct
sentence beginning with "I want..." Instead, people give philosophical answers,
childish goals; incomplete sentences, conflicting goals, incongruent goals,
negative goals or abstract goals. Each objection to clarity
can be dissolved. (See: "Peeling the Soul Onion".)
Identity Issues
Lost Identity, Identifications
and
Identity Conflict are not described by psychotherapy nor NLP . Lost
Identity refers to a person who has no basic sense of
"self-ness". For this person, the pronoun "I" has little meaning.
Identification
refers to the displacement of "self" by another personality, and
Identity Conflict refers to a person with at least two
conscious personalities.
Schizophrenia
. Bipolar Disorder .
Depression
Soul Access
At first I used NLP methods similar to Robert Dilts'
"Vision Walk". A person steps towards an imagined ideal future with a sense of a goal
direction (this by itself has no therapeutic value). If a Vision Walk is
preceded by clean goal setting, and a person has no existential benefits
for not
experiencing integrity, that person may find a state of transcendental
connectedness that is often described as blissful. Usually, people have objections
to being happy - and their objections can be incorporated until
each step is resourceful, leading to goals that define life fulfillment.
Relationship Coaching
My early article "Thoughtforms" was
published in NLP World Volume 2, 1995. A Thoughtform was a name for
the limiting or negative influence of another person, typically described as a
visual metaphor. A person may say "I have a black chain around my
legs" or "I have a gray cloud around my heart".
Thoughtforms often represent a person's toxic relationship bonds to important people.
Unskilled messing around with relationship bonds can reduce a person's ability to bond to other
people.
Relationship Bonds
. Emotional Incest
Trauma Coaching
Following Bond work, you have more access to your body feelings
and emotions (which may include feeling exhausted if you were previously
dissociated). As past events may give rise to strong emotions,
past trauma may still inhibit you from fulfilling life. See Trauma & PTSD.
Dissociating unpleasant emotions is worse than
useless. Within 3 to 12 weeks, dissociated emotions often return stronger
than before; manifesting as foggy depressions or as
disease symptoms.
Copyright © Martyn Carruthers: 1999-2009 All rights reserved.
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