|
We offer coaching and training on family therapy, codependence,
parent coaching and relationship entanglements.
Coaching Children
Coaching children is challenging. Yet, coaching children is
rewarding work, whether to improve sport, schoolwork, music or relationships.
When coaching children, three challenges are to treat each child as a person,
to accept children who do not communicate well, who have
attachment disorders or
learning disabilities and to avoid
favoring children who have exceptional abilities.
When coaching children and adolescents, explore what
motivates them, NOT what motivates you! To interact better with them, understand
their family lives, interests, personality, sports, hobbies and skills.
Watching and listening are at least as important as talking.
|
A 1989 survey showed that children value the
following
(in order of importance to them) during sport coaching:
|
|
1. Improving their skills
2. Playing, using their skills
3. A good relationship with the coach
4. Being selected for a team
5. Competing and trying to win
|
6. Having exciting, close games
7. Being with friends
8. Wearing a correct uniform
9. Beating opponents
10. Receiving medals or trophies
|
You can coach children to improve their skills, change their
beliefs, and develop their sense of identity. As children need adult models,
good coaching can foster a sense of belonging and a base from which children
deal with many life challenges. Children from chaotic family backgrounds can
model a coach.
You can coach children to develop relationship and
emotional intelligence, academic
ability and effective thinking. You can coach children to practice and develop
leadership, academic skills, decision-making and responsibility as well as
adventures and fun. You can help create an environment in which children not
only succeed but develop emotional maturity.
Other aspects of coaching children involve
dealing with personal crisis (accidents or illness), family crisis
(divorce, death or serious disease of the parents)
and moving home (leaving friends).
Parent Alienation .
Divorce Children .
Child Abuse
Downside
If you coach children, you risk being called a child abuser.
Although most client abuse is between male
coaches and female clients, other abusive relationships between client
and coach can occur.
|
If you coach children or young adults, you
may be wise to exaggerate your professional relationship with slightly paranoid
behavior, especially if you are male.
Ignoring this can result in strong consequences.
|
Although few coaches are predators - some few have molested
children. Parents can conduct a background check on a coach and coaches can
offer an ethical statement that specifies their policy when working with
children and young adults.
You can offer a written policy that
describes your definitions of sexual harassment and includes that you will not
involve yourself in non-coaching relationships with young clients. For example:
- Don't buy presents for young clients
- Don't make phone calls to young clients at night
- Don't go to young clients' homes without a parent present
You can educate clients about child abuse,
and why these actions are inappropriate for a coach. Warn children that this could
happen. Children who have been sexually molested, for example, may believe this
happens to every child. Nobody else may have explained appropriate relationship
behavior.
Many coaches feel angry and embarrassed about this topic - and
avoid it. They know that they are good people and they feel so sick about child
abuse that they may avoid discussing it.
|
Some competent, ethical coaches will not
coach children or teenagers - fearing false accusations that could
destroy their reputation. Be professional and cautious!
|
Protect Yourself!
Avoid being alone with children or teenagers. Have
a parent or assistant coach present at least most of the time. A spouse,
a friend or another coach can eliminate your being alone with children ... or
with child-like adults.
|
An emotionally unstable child or
teenager may make false accusations
if he or she feels rejected by you.
|
- Avoid being alone in a car with a child.
- Avoid transporting children except in emergency or unusual situations
when a parent agrees.
- Avoid personal communications and keep copies of all letters or e-mails.
- Avoid gifts. It's better to ask parents to buy things. Give any gifts
to the parents and ask the parents give it to the child if they wish. Don't
give gifts to children directly.
- Be alert if a child shows particular fondness for you. If a child shows
inappropriate interest in you, seems to want to hang around you or tells you
how special you are, set boundaries and avoid spending any more time with
that child than you would with any other child.
- A child who is dependent and emotionally unstable may make a false accusation
if that child feels rejected. If a child says, 'He/she did something to me,'
you may be in deep trouble!
|
Build and maintain professional relationships!
|
Click HERE to make an appointment!
Plagiarism is theft. Copyright © Martyn Carruthers 1996-2010
All rights reserved.
|
Our
Coaching .
Our Coach
Training .
For Organizers
.
Corporate Coaching
