What is it about me that attracts idiots?
Of course I'm unique - just like everyone else.
I do use my imagination - I'm very suspicious.
I don't want to solve my conflict - I want revenge!
I don't know whether to have a baby or to get a dog.
I took an intelligence test and the results were negative.
A good solution to my problem would be someone I can blame.
I am willing to make mistakes if someone else is willing to learn from them.
My son doesn't know that his girlfriend is a bad choice. She's not at all like me.

How do you spell PTSD?
Why should I suffer in silence when I can complain?
When I want to relax I think about ways I can get revenge.
Women should say "Yes" or "No" faster to save unnecessary effort.
Who do I blame for my problems? I can always find someone to blame!
I accept my personality problems - without them I would have no personality.
I do take responsibility for my actions ... when they are not someone else's fault.
I do NOT sit in my living room watching television all day. I also have a TV in my bedroom!
First I say nice things about myself, then I do nice things for myself, then I find someone to buy nice things for me.

I want to change my future.
Please make it didn't happen!
I don't want to tell so many lies but I want to keep my job.
My wife helps me appreciate how very wonderful is my girlfriend.
How can I learn from my past when I am worried about my future?
How can I divorce my wife without telling her? She will be very angry.
Of course I find humor in my everyday life ... I look for people I can laugh at.
All I want is a partner who is rich, sexy, educated, charming and who loves me. That's all.
My boyfriend had a heart attack while we made love. I didn't know that people could die so happy.
If a relationship works, there's not much to talk about. If it doesn't work, there's nothing to talk about.
 

Men act like children ... so I treat them that way.
How did I find you? God told me to Google emotional maturity!
Only people as intelligent as I am can possibly understand me.
I know your Soulwork works in practice - but does it work in theory?
You can have more website visitors if you add pornographic pictures!
I don't expect to change anything - I just want to tell you how bad it is!
My partner made me come to see you. I want you to prove her wrong!
My partner treats me like a piece of furniture - so of course I act like one.
We want a combination of therapy and medication so that we can stay together!
I want to be wealthy and single, but I don't meet many eligible bachelors who are dying!

I will pay you when I can afford it
You're the best trainer in the world
I will do every part of my homework
I have done every part of my homework
I only want to make other people happy
I will solve that problem tomorrow

I asked my spirit guides do the exercise for me
We weren't sure what to do so we went for coffee
|We didn't actually DO the exercise - but we did TALK about it
I didn't like the exercise so I asked my partner to massage me
Your exercise was too difficult so we made up our own exercise
My exercise partner was just like my mother - she didn't like me at all
I told my exercise partner what I intuited about her sex life and now she won't talk to me

I didn't do the exercise because:

• I'm a philosopher
• We both needed a cigarette
• I only do exercises with my boyfriend
• None of those bastards will talk to me
• I didn't want to learn anything more today

• Martyn - agreeable as usual ...

If you ask "Is it possible that ...?" - my answer is "Yes"
If you ask "Is it always true that ...?" - my answer is "No"
If you ask "Is it this way or that way?" - my answer is "Yes"
If you ask "Is it true or false that ...?" - my answer is "Exactly"

• I Missed my Appointment because ...

You didn't empower me enough
You are not seeing the big picture
I discovered a new fear of success
I'm sorry but I started to feel better
The date on the calendar was closer than I thought
I didn't want to tell you I wasn't coming in case you felt bad

I want to be a virgin again
I want everybody to love me
I want you to stop asking me such hard questions!
I want to feel like I'm five years old for the rest of my life (woman aged 40)
I know that you can solve all my problems in one session - if you really wanted to
I must be happy so that I can get married but I must be married so that I can be happy.

Every sentence tells a story ... these stories are mostly from my first few years of workshops, when I was much more naive, much less prepared and worked with many amateurs. Many of these comments I heard more than once. And the first and last ones still make me flinch! Martyn

If it is meant to be - it will happen
I have few friends and little credibility
How could I predict that that would happen?
Two of the students are diagnosed as psychotic
Relax ... they're both on medication ... I hope ...
You must heal me before I promote your training
I don't need to promote you - I know all my friends will come
I'm sure that I can put an advertisement in the library and find 30 students

My expenses should be your risk
Your expenses are your problem
I'm sorry but the training room is very close to a ...
I told them that you can channel alien life forms
Your translator is 15 years old (Czech Republic)
I will promote you how I think you should be promoted
I told them that you can solve all their problems in one weekend
Your talk will be to a group of business consultants and intuitive healers

It's your fault for thinking bad thoughts
You can solve my problems in the evenings
You can heal my psychotic brother on your day off
I know I agreed to settle finances today, but ...
All my friends told me that they would come
I need your money more than you do
At the last moment I decided I wasn't ready
You can stay with me (in my tiny apartment)

The ONLY thing I forgot to tell them was the date!
I know I booked the wrong flight - but you should pay for it
You can sleep in our son's bedroom - he's in hospital with an infectious disease
I'm sorry that you trusted me
 

I protect my clients from reality
Please don't confuse me with facts!
I can't teach if there are skeptics in the room
I don't need your permission to teach your work!
I would accept ANYBODY into my courses - who will pay
Copyright and intellectual property are obsolete concepts!

If I don't know it - it's not worth knowing
If you don't trust me, you are a bad person!
If I read an article about something - I can teach it
Why should I demonstrate - it would only confuse them!
I don't demonstrate ... I explain why people must change
Of course I'm right - I've been teaching it that way for years!
Their spirit guides will reveal the details to them when they are ready

I can only teach students who are like me
Don't worry - their unconscious minds will get it!
Privacy and confidentiality are not valid in classrooms
I would give all my students Elite Grand Master certificates!
Students don't want demonstrations or exercises - they want theory
I am very flexible - my students can agree with me any way that they want!

Reading these comments can cause me to laugh out loud ... they remind me of difficult conversations with interesting people. And maybe you were there. Martyn Carruthers

Bonus: Practical Coaching Laws

• There's no such thing as a family secret!
• Many personal problems begin with positive thinking!
• Whatever happens, act as though you are pleased it happened!
• To err is human... to blame your client for your errors is also human.
• When you fully understand a client, your coaching is probably finished!
• The essential resources are where you'd least expect to find them!
• For every suggestion, there is an equal and opposite objection!
• The solution is always the last thing you try!
• He who laughs last just got paid!

You will never understand your own issues as well as you understand your clients' issues.
Martyn