Do you feel sad, alone or incomplete?
Do you seek a Soul Mate?
Many people attempt to control such feelings with distractions and drugs.
We help people change the consequences associated with losing a womb-twin.
Human twins are famous for
a closeness that seems to begin in their mother's womb. Although most people
forget their pre-birth experiences, most twins share
strong bonds throughout their lives. If a twin dies, the surviving twin will
likely experience many unpleasant consequences ... consequences that may also
occur if a twin died before birth, while still in the womb.
IF YOU ARE CONCERNED
ABOUT YOUR HEALTH, A PREGNANCY,
OR THE HEALTH OF A CHILD, PLEASE CONSULT A MEDICAL DOCTOR
Perhaps the idea of vanishing twins began in ancient Greece.
Over 2000 years ago, the philosopher Plato wrote that people are
conceived perfect, and then split in half by Zeus. Plato described
human loneliness, the desire for lost perfection and searching for
twin souls ... sometimes called
... and when one of them meets
the other half, the actual half of himself,
the pair are lost in an amazement of love
and friendship and intimacy and
one will not be out of the other's sight
even for a moment ... Plato (340 BC)
Most multiple pregnancies result in single babies. Although ultrasound technology can identify multiple pregnancies very early in
pregnancy, ultrasound technicians may be instructed not
to tell the mothers, nor record the existence of more than one fetus, to avoid triggering feelings of grief and loss.
They know well
that later ultrasound scans will show mostly singletons. Many twins will have
I was told that I had twin
babies ... twins are common in my family ... but a month later
they said that there was only one heartbeat. My disappointment
was worse than I could have imagined, even though I have a lovely
baby girl. After you helped me include my dead twin in my
family, I felt so much better. London
When a twin disappears, the surviving twin may develop emotional
problems, even if the child is not told that a twin vanished. Dr.
William Baldwin wrote in Spirit Releasement Therapy that a dead twin
attaches its soul to the surviving twin. Dr. Alice Rose wrote in Coping
with Eating Disabilities that some eating disorders are the result of a
twin dying in the womb due to competition for nourishment. But one twin
cannot eat the other, as is sometimes reported. That's a myth-take.
Dr. Michael Newton, author of Destiny of Souls, disagrees
with the notion of twin souls. He wrote that his clients have
primary soul-mates rather than twin souls.
If a multiple pregnancy results in one live birth, the surviving
child might feel that an important person is missing. This may motivate a search for
the missing person, often called a soul twin or soul mate, with high expectations of happiness and
hopes of fulfillment.
(We also find that people with aborted siblings
often spend their lives seeking, foe example, older brothers or younger sisters).
Are You a Womb Twin?
Are you a womb twin? We help people
explore this issue and
change unpleasant consequences. If you have not
our innovative changework, perhaps this is an opportunity for
If you search for a soul mate, you will often find
transferences - potential
perfect partners - but you will later reject them as inadequate. When people transfer
a dead twin onto living people, the subsequent devotion to and the later
dismissal of those people can cause huge suffering, especially if some of those
people simultaneously transfer a dead sibling onto you. We can help you
sort these relationships out.
In Vitro Fertilization (IVF)
In-vitro means in glass. Couples who cannot
conceive naturally may visit an in-vitro or IVF laboratory
where egg cells from the woman are fertilized in vitro, usually
with the husband's sperm. A few of the embryos are then implanted in the woman's
uterus. Most embryos are discarded - very few develop into living babies. (See Infertility)
Hundreds of thousands of human embryo die in IVF clinics. Sadly,
unwanted embryos are garbage, although their stem cells may be extracted for
research. (We are still researching the emotional and behavioral
consequences of people created by in-vitro fertilization or embryo transfer.)
Vanishing twin syndrome was described by Dr. Stoeckel in 1945
as multiple gestation with subsequent disappearance of one or more fetus.
Vanishing twin syndrome is more often diagnosed if ultrasound is used during
early pregnancy. Statistics vary, but about 90% of twins die or vanish
before birth. This is also called Twin Embolization Syndrome.
conception rate may 30%, but the twin birth rate is
This suggests a high chance that you shared your mother's
womb with a twin.
The death of a fetal twin is a high risk factor for cerebral
palsy. When a fraternal twin dies in the womb, the prevalence of cerebral
palsy in a surviving twin is increased by a factor of 40 (8%, compared to
an overall prevalence of 0.2%), perhaps due to variations in the fetal
blood supply (U
of Liverpool 2003).
Since our last session I have
been feeling a lot better. Although "vanishing twin"
sounds weird, I feel that something has really shifted! I feel a
lot lighter and my sadness seems to have gone. Rosemaree
Shalhoub, Sydney, Australia
Occasionally, a dead fetus may be ejected with the afterbirth
as a small cluster of tissues (fetus papyraceous). Sometimes,
remains of the missing fetus are found within the womb twin
survivor, perhaps in a teratoma tumor containing fetal tissues.
Occasionally, a tiny skeleton is seen within an x-ray of an adult or
is discovered during surgery. Whichever way, a twin has ... vanished.
2008 Dr. Paul Grabb, a pediatric
surgeon, removed a tumor from the brain of a Colorado Springs infant.
The tumor contained a tiny foot and other partially formed body parts.
If the fetuses of fraternal twins
merge, a chimera is formed with two sets of DNA.
(If the fetuses of identical twins merge ... all body cells
will have the same DNA).
Are You a Chimera?
A womb twin survivor may have different
DNA in different parts of the body. Two eggs fertilized
by two sperm cells create fraternal twins. If one baby develops,
with body cells from two different fetus ... the result is called a
chimera ... a fusion of two fraternal twins.
A human chimera with
two sets of DNA, in different parts of the body, may experience a conflict of identity. If a
person has assimilated both male and female cells, sexual
confusion or disorientation might be anticipated. See
Coaching for Womb Twin Survivors
Part 2: Consequences of Missing, Dead or Vanishing Twins
Some people unconsciously identify with a dead family
member - especially when that person died in a way that induces guilt. Such
common, for example, following a suicide, an abortion ... or the death of a
sibling. We often coach people to quickly manage these deep-seated fixations
My twin died during childbirth.
I sought a soul mate all my life ... but I never connected
that with my
dead twin. I was always sad ... and I didn't connect those dots either.
During our sessions I 'found' myself! It seems obvious now that I can
be happy. Ireland
Losing a twin can be a significant emotional experience.
Although behavioral and emotional problems resulting from the loss
of unborn twins are outside the models used by most helping professionals,
we offer coaching solutions for these consequences, for other
issues concerning dead relatives and for
brothers and sister problems).
I always wanted a soulmate.
My mother had two abortions after I was born. During our coaching
I strongly felt the presence of a missing child - perhaps one of
or what you call a vanishing twin. Since our
coaching I feel more complete. Spain
Many womb twin survivors show some of
- Avoids finishing projects
- Cannot specify clear goals
- Sense of profound loneliness
- Feels peaceful in cemeteries
- Believes part of self is missing
- Fascinated or obsessed by twins
- Chronic melancholy or sadness
- Dark rings around eyes
- Immature, childish behavior
- Extremely sensitive to people
- May obsess about a perfect partner
- May prefer codependent relationships
- Has miscarriages or stillborn babies
- May be depressed - life does not make sense
Beliefs, Bonds & Soul Mates
It seems that entanglement with a missing sibling may be
expressed as behaviors based on emotions such as guilt, shame and sadness;
and on unpleasant beliefs that support inappropriate behavior (e.g. obsessions,
compulsions, eating disorders or hypochondria). Examples of these limiting
- I am abandoned and left alone
- I am guilty for living - I cannot be happy
- My spiritual path is searching for my soul mate
- If I don't find my soul mate I will always feel alone
- I give my life energy to my soul mate / missing twin
These and similar beliefs seem common in people seeking
soulmates. While being with a twin soul is often described as
profoundly spiritual, intimate and inspirational, people we have met who tell us
about their Soul Mate relationships often seem enmeshed in
short-term conditional love, symbiosis or codependence.
I always felt that a special
woman was waiting for me ... hurting and broken ... and it was
my life mission to find her and heal her.
I was only attracted to damaged women.
Since our 'missing twin'
work I feel complete ... and I want a complete
We help womb twin survivors change
negative emotions and habits.
We offer solutions for other relationship and emotional entanglements.
Online Life Coaching, Counseling
& Soulwork Therapy
IF YOU HAVE ANY CONCERNS
AT ALL ABOUT YOUR HEALTH, A PREGNANCY,
OR THE HEALTH OF A CHILD, PLEASE CONSULT A MEDICAL DOCTOR
I thought you were just
another therapist - but you were not just. Not even. Not only.
Plagiarism is theft.
Copyright © Martyn Carruthers 2009-2013 All rights reserved