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Are you or your partner enmeshed in difficult
or painful emotions? Do you still struggle with old disappointments? Do you
suffer from your parents' drama, or from your partner's parents?
Do
you want to untangle your lives ... as you reclaim your freedom ...
together?
Reconciliation Strategies that WORK!
Is your marriage or partnership in trouble? Is it time for you
to decide whether or not to continue an existing relationship - or whether or
not to attempt reconciliation - or whether or not to separate?
Key ingredients of good partnership include understanding,
love, acceptance, gratitude, responsibility and teamwork. Our individual
coaching can help you solve individual issues and prepare for happy
partnership. Our couples coaching can help you and your partner resolve
partnership problems, while our family coaching can help you solve
problems with children, in-laws and other family challenges.
Do you stay in a partnership out of despair or elation? Do you
feel trapped? Do you pray for your partner to change? Do you consider or try sexual
affairs? Do you hope to be rescued? Or do you want to change your relationship
habits and build your partnership on integrity for lasting happiness?
Important relationships require constant
attention - not only when they are damaged.
Couple
Coaching Flowchart & Testimonial .
Couple Communication Exercises
Good intentions may not survive predictable partnership
challenges. We can coach you to evaluate, reconcile and change your relationships
- and your relationship habits. We can help you and your partner express love,
build commitment and share your partnership skills.
We can help you understand and validate each other's history,
perspectives, beliefs and values, as a basis for a caring relationship which
supports you both. We don't ask anybody to give up or give in! We can coach you to coach each other.
Put ELATION into RelationSHIPS
How do you show love to each other?
Your relationship depends on how you both express love
for each other. Insincere or withheld love may not survive the challenges
of everyday reality. Does one of you not commit to partnership because
of bad habits, entangled relationships,
confusion or emotions? Your feelings that you call love may
not be enough - a good partnership needs partnership skills.
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We were in love and we got married -
and a year later we were talking about divorce. Fortunately we talked to
you before going to a divorce court. We learned about how we can give
and receive love, instead of assuming that feeling good was enough.
JA & DA, Milan, Italy |
Can reconciliation solve your problems?
How long do you wait before you seek help? Do you wait
until your suffering reaches PANIC? By then, it may be too late. You may
alienate your partner or become dependent on some drug. The
earlier you request our online coaching
- the more likely that we can help you.
Do you both want to solve relationship problems? Or
do you create problems to motivate separation? If you or your partner is
sabotaging your partnership, your situation may seem unsolvable and your
separation inevitable - unless you both want intimacy and long-term
reconciliation.
We can help you and your partner resolve old arguments;
financial problems, boredom and frustration. If both of you can commit to
evaluating your partnership -
we can help you make budgets, reverse boredom and change arguments into
stimulating, loving conversations.
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My
(gay) partner and I have been together six years ... you helped us
explore how to love each other while preparing for when his HIV
positive state becomes AIDS. |
If either one of you rejects possibilities for
reconciliation, then indifference, separation or affairs may seem
inevitable. Although we provide separation and divorce coaching -
many couples find better ways to love each other. We have
coached many couples to transform their lives.
Your Partner is not Perfect
And neither are you! Many people who become partners -
and many people who separate - are motivated by fantasies. What was
perfection yesterday may be intolerable today ...
Reasons for Marriage and Divorce
These may seem funny at first ...
and these are VERY realistic!
I loved him because he was so masculine
and assertive;
I left him because he was so domineering.
I liked her because she was so gentle and petite;
I dumped her because she was so weak and helpless.
I married him because he had a good income;
I divorced him because he was always working.
I married her because she was always so
attractive;
I left her because she spent so much time in front of a mirror.
I married him because he was so romantic and sociable;
I divorced him because he was such a fun-loving playboy.
I married her because she was so quiet and dependent;
I divorced her because she was so boring and clinging.
I loved him because he was so neat and organized;
We separated because he was compulsive and controlling.
I married her because she was so sociable and talkative;
I left her because she would never shut up.
I married him because of his great sense of
humor;
I left him because he kept laughing at me. |
You may imagine that somewhere - a more perfect person is waiting
for you. Or, maybe your partner wants to make a change (e.g. new job, new house or traveling)
that you feel would exclude you; or perhaps one of you has an affair;
or one of you exposes previously hidden goals. Most relationship crises are predictable
- and preventable - and we can help you survive them ... if you want.
Predictable Partnership
. Premarital Coaching
. Hawaiian Wedding
Do either of you confuse relationship requirements with an ultimatum,
manipulation or emotional blackmail? None of these require separation or divorce -
reconciliation requires careful evaluation to find out what happened, why it happened
and how to effectively prevent similar issues in the future.
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I married a perfect woman. She was clever, rich
and gorgeous. But when her dad had money problems, we both had to work and we were
soon fighting every day. Although we were ready to split, your reconciliation sessions
helped us ... we don't have expensive cars and holidays now, but we are adult partners
... not adult children! Sussex, UK |
Do you want Reconciliation?
We can help you evaluate and improve your partnership - and
reconcile relationships with family, ex-partners, friends and colleagues. We
can help you check and dissolve doubts; and make
decisions about the shape of your lives together.
Couple Coaching .
Partnership Breakdown .
Divorce Coaching
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I and my husband were ready to end twelve
years of marriage. We had given up. When a friend told us about you, we
thought we were too far gone ... but you helped us change many of our
worst habits. Although that was painful ... now we can be together - ready to
love each other as we rebuild our lives together. Chester, England |
If you do not solve partnership problems quickly - you
may destroy potentially-wonderful relationships. Your expressions of love can
become bogged down in emotional incest, passive-aggression, depression,
codependence - or worse. Why wait for worse? Why wait at all?
Evaluating Partnership
Happy partnership usually requires that partners have similar
core values - although they don't have to agree on every detail. We help people
evaluate emotions, communicate values, clarify relationships and make clear
decisions. We help couples enjoy a new start, as they learn to appreciate each
other and share their highest values.
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You helped us discover that our core values
were compatible, and that we both wanted the same type of relationship. Your
coaching transcended our personal goals, sexual attraction and habits -
you reminded us that we can choose to be happy together.
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Online Coaching for Reconciliation
Sharing thoughts and feelings is relationship first aid. We coach
partners to make clear decisions.
If you want separation, we can help you
dissolve emotional bonds and repair broken dreams peacefully. If you want
reconciliation, we can help you rebuild healthy, happy partnership.
Plagiarism is theft. Copyright © Martyn Carruthers
1998-2012 All rights reserved
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