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The pharmaceutical and electronic wonders of modern medicine appear to
pace a decline in emotional contact between helping professionals and
their patients. Medical doctors often refer to patients as symptoms -
e.g. "Nurse - the liver cancer in room 6 is upset". We help
people connect with their world, while solving emotional blocks, relationship conflicts
and planning problems.
We are often asked whether we can help people who
are suffering from some disease. Unless we are medical doctors, we
do not diagnose or treat medical symptoms ... we help people sort out their feelings and relationships.
Relationships & Disease
Relationship problems and emotional difficulties may
harm metabolic control and worsen disease symptoms. We help people manage
their emotions and relationships:
- improve relationships with family, friends and
professionals
- manage emotions, beliefs and stress
- help people live full lives, promoting emotional
well being
- support healthy behaviors, such as diet and
physical activity
- help patients and family members cope with
emotional distress
Relationships with Families, Friends & Professionals
Relationships imply both harmony and differences ...
relationship conflicts are often a sign of healthy relationships -
people who hide or avoid conflicts often feel overly insecure
or dependent. Conflicts - and managing conflicts - are part of all
relationships, whether with babies or upper management.
People with disease may show severe mood swings. Sick
people may be unaware of these mood swings; in each moment acting as if
their current emotion is an appropriate basis for long-term decisions.
During these times, their relationships may be under severe stress. An
ill person may seem quite normal, yet say horrible things. Strange new
ideas may be announced as facts or a person may respond to a loving
partner as if to a near-stranger.
Managing Emotions, Beliefs & Stress
We can assist and support people to deal with
emotions associated with drugs and medications; and to improve the quality
of relationships during difficult and troubling times. Some difficult
topics are:
- Events causing anger, anxiety or sadness
- Beliefs about cause, seriousness, treatment
effectiveness
- Depression
- Stress and Trauma
- Death and Dying
- Survivor Guilt
1. Events causing anger, anxiety or sadness
Anger, anxiety and sadness appear to be the primary unpleasant
emotions that many people want to "get rid of", "cut out"
or "throw away"! In our coaching, these unpleasant emotions are
perceived as excellent and accessible doors to explore relationships and
relationship bonds.
We help people manage and change unpleasant emotions.
2. Beliefs about Cause, Seriousness and Treatment
While your beliefs may not be accepted by other people,
they are real to you, and you will likely strive to prove or confirm
your beliefs. If you believe that your disease is a just reward for your
past action, you may not be motivated to heal. If you believe that your
disease is temporary, you may ignore treatment. And if you believe that
your treatment is ineffectual or counter-productive, you may resist it.
We help people manage and change limiting beliefs.
3. Depression
People with chronic disease seem more likely to suffer from
depression, and people with depression are at greater risk of
chronic disease. Depression may reduce the desire to take needed
medications and/or to follow the prescribed treatment for disease.
Depression may increase blood pressure and blood clotting and can
also lead to elevated cholesterol. These risk factors, with obesity,
form a group of signs and symptoms that often serve as
both a predictor of and a response to heart disease.
Often, an underlying issue is guilt. If a person feels guilty,
life may not make sense, which leads to depression. We can help
people resolve guilt from:
- Abuse, betrayal or abandonment (e.g. betraying a partner
or abandoning a child)
- Relationship transferences (e.g. perceiving a partner as
a parent or child)
4. Stress & Trauma
Stress influences disease. Emotional stress leads to
the secretion of hormones that can disrupt metabolic control.
Psychological trauma can accompany or follow treatment, for example after
major surgery or mastectomy. The resulting strong emotions can disrupt a
person’s relationships, eating habits, exercise and daily routines,
and disturb heart disease treatment. A patient’s emotional needs and
problems are important components of disease treatment and integral
to disease management.
5. Death, Dying & Grief
Some people with diseases will die. The family, helping
professionals and friends can help prepare a person for this possibility
- or they may avoid informing the person. A difficult decision is how
much psychoactive drugs (usually pain-killing opiates) to administer
during a person's final hours.
We can help people prepare for the death of a
relative or friend, and express appropriate grief.
6. Survivor Guilt
People with life-threatening diseases often form
close communities; bonded by suffering. The community members live under
the threat and expectation of death - and those who survive while others
die may experience an existential crisis, asking "Why should I
live and not them?" Such a crisis exposes guilt and self-
esteem issues. If ignored, survivor guilt may lead to chronic depression.
Consult a physician about any
opinions or recommendations about medical conditions.
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